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Aug. 12th, 2010 03:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cassievalentinePart 4 of Introspection and the Outside World
Teal'c
Failure
**
It was bright and sunny outside and he was busy with the other boys in the neighborhood, pretending to be members of their God's army.
They were waging their own terrific war in the name of Cronus when his mother had come out side and shooed the other boys to their mothers before bringing him inside.
Teal'c didn't understand why the soldiers of Cronus were at their house. He tried to be brave and stand proudly at her side, but the Jaffa were so tall and their staff weapons so intimidating that he quickly hid himself behind his mother's skirts.
He could bring himself to do nothing more than cling to her and peak out around her. They cast a quick eye down at him before bringing their eyes back up to his mother and continuing their conversation.
His father was Cronus' First Prime and when your father was First Prime and away in battle, there was only one reason that soldiers appeared at your door.
Teal'c swallowed hard but didn't do anything except pull himself up as tall as he could. If he was right, he was going to have additional responsibilities around the house now.
“You will come immediately,” the guard said, stepping back slightly.
His mother's face tightened before she reached behind her and ushered Teal'c to step out and walk beside her. He looked up at her and was not surprised to see that she was standing tall, her chin raised slightly as they walked down the street towards Cronus' palace.
As soon as they stepped into the lavish palace, Teal'c shrunk into his mother's side slightly. He wanted to be brave, but he was actually walking in his God's palace and he was more than a little intimidated.
Placing a soft hand on his back, Teal’c’s mother urged her son on and into the throne room. They both knelt in front of Cronus without hesitation.
When his father appeared, injured but alive, Teal'c was at a loss as to why there were there. Usually when the family of the First Prime was led to the palace, it meant that the First Prime had fallen in glorious battle and would be honored as a hero.
The next few moments burned their way into Teal’c’s mind and stayed there for the rest of his life, although it took several years to actually unravel the series of events.
His father was dragged in front of Cronus and berated for not sacrificing his life for his God. Ronac tried to protest, but Cronus would hear nothing of it. Cronus quickly announced that Teal'c and his mother would be exiled for his dishonor. Then there was the flash of movement before Cronus was on top of Ronac. The God ripped his fathers armour off before plunging his hand into the symbiote pouch. Teal'c had no choice but to watch as Cronus slowly squeezed the life of his fathers symbiote. Ronac fell to the floor soon after.
Teal'c and his mother were ushered to the Chappa'ai and then to Chulak as a gift to Apophis.
They fell to the ground in front of Apophis' First Prime and were quickly grabbed and dragged to his palace, swearing their loyalty before having their tattoos removed and replaced.
They tied Teal'c down tightly, but that wasn’t necessary. He lay perfectly still while the painful procedures took place. Teal'c was too busy thinking about what he had seen in Cronus' palace to be concerned with what was happening at the moment.
His father had failed in battle according to Cronus, but hadn't according to his father.
Teal'c had always been taught that to properly serve one's God, one must be honest and true to one's self.
You couldn't be true to your self if you lied, so Teal'c had to assume that his father wasn't lying.
That didn't surprise him at all, because his father had been an honest man, a man who never lied about anything. But Cronus had said that Ronac had failed, that he was lying about what had happened during the battle.
Since gods had no reason to lie, Teal’c drew the conclusion that his father was the liar and not Cronos. Ronac failed in battle and lied to cover his mistakes with no regard for what it would mean to his wife and son. His father was a coward, and this revelation scared Teal'c far more than anything else he had witnessed today.
“They boy did not cry out, My Lord,” the First Prime said with a touch of wonder in his voice. Teal'c looked around and realized he was now standing in the throne room.
“Is that so?” Apophis asked, leaning forward as his lavish robes whispered against themselves. “Bring him to me.”
The First Prime quickly took Teal'c by the arm and up a short flight of stairs, where the boy immediately fell to his knees, his eyes locked on his God’s feet for a second before being dragged upright again.
Apophis studied him for a long moment before ordering him to look him in the eye. Teal'c did hesitantly, locking eyes with his God for a moment before quickly dropping his gaze again.
“He is indeed a fine specimen,” Apophis pronounced after a moment, sliding back onto his throne. “Begin his training immediately, Bra'tac. I want you to oversee it personally.”
“Yes, my Lord,” the First Prime said with a slight nod of his head before ushering the boy out of the room. And with that, Teal'c's life was changed forever.
*&*
Impending parenthood
**
Normally, the hours Teal'c would spend working out with Bra'tac sped along. Before he knew it, Bra'tac would be calling an end to the day’s session as the sun began to dip below the horizon, signaling the end of another day.
Today however, things were not moving as smoothly as normal. Teal'c had been working with Bra'tac for hours now, but his head was not into the practice.
The former First Prime was beating him left and right at every turn instead of every second turn like usual, and no matter how many times the old man pointed this out, Teal'c couldn't force his mind back to the task at hand. Teal'c inability to focus his mind on the task at hand was leaving both men more than a little frustrated.
Teal'c wanted to be frustrated himself, wanted to narrow his focus to the sparing practice that he was supposed to be participating in but he couldn't. His thoughts were spread in a million different directions and improving his skills as a warrior was not a high priority at the moment.
He knew this in itself should be a learning moment. That no matter what is going on in a warrior's life, he should remain focused on the battle at all times. If he didn't, he was sure to be killed.
“You are distracted. Again,” Bra'tac said, lowering his staff weapon.
The disappointment and frustration in his voice was more than evident. Teal'c lowered his staff weapon as well as he wondered whether or not to share the source of his distraction with his mentor.
“Drey'auc is with child,” he finally admitted. Bra'tac's face lit up in a smile and he slapped Teal'c on the back, offering his congratulations.
“A child is indeed a blessing,” he said proudly. “May your son be a great warrior and your daughter a fine woman.” Teal'c accepted the standard congratulation. “You are not pleased?” he asked after a moment.
“I am . . . concerned.”
“As you should be,” Bra'tac replied gravely, inclining his head slightly as he leaned on his staff weapon.
“If the Goa'uld are indeed false Gods, what kind of world am I bringing a child into?” he asked. “What right do I have to bring a child into this world only to have them forced into the servitude of a false God?”
“What right does a false God have to deny you the honor and pleasure of raising a child?” Bra'tac countered. Teal'c sighed heavily. “Are you concerned because of what happened to your father?” he asked cautiously.
“How can I be the father my child deserves if my own father was killed before I truly knew him?” Teal'c asked quietly, finally admitting his real fears.
“You are a fine man and a great warrior. Your honesty and integrity set you above any other warrior I have ever met. These qualities alone will allow you to raise an exceptional child. Plus, you must remember that you will not be alone in this arduous task. Drey'auc will be by your side through this journey.”
Teal'c considered these words carefully for a moment before Bra'tac called him back to reality again.
“I should be scolding you for allowing yourself to be distracted by personal matters,” Bra'tac said, a grave look on his face.
Teal'c quickly assured him that his mind was now at ease and could focus wholly on his training.
Teal'c's picked up his staff weapon and readied himself, but his mind was no more on the sparing practice than it was before.
However, this time instead of worrying about his ability to parent, he was picturing a healthy boy who would look up to him and admire him.
*&*
Loyalties
**
These humans had plainer taste than the Goa'uld.
Teal'c’s normal surroundings consisted of gold softened with the finest silks and satins, not hard gray concrete walls. There was very little in the room to break up the monotony of the gray, either.
With nothing else to do, Teal'c sat patiently on the bed in the room the humans had placed him. O'Neill had assured him that he was safe, that this was all standard procedure, but he wasn't completely sure.
If he had to deal with a defector, he would use whatever means necessary to obtain – and verify – any information that person might have. The humans didn't do that.
What the humans had done is given him a thorough medical examination, even though he assured them that his symbiote protected him from any pathogens.
He was then asked to removed his amour and wear the clothing they provided for him and asked to wait in a room devoid of anything except for a bed and facilities to relieve himself should the need arise.
Not lost to him was the fact that there was a guard standing outside his door and a monitoring device affixed to the ceiling in the corner of the room. He focused his attention on that small device for a moment before refocusing his gaze straight ahead.
He sat with his back ramrod straight; ready to react at a moments notice, just as he had always been trained to do.
Teal’c had been sitting in the room for some time now, trying to figure out exactly what their plan was. Had O'Neill lied to him? Had he risked his live to save O'Neill, his team and the other prisoners only to become a prisoner himself after being promised freedom?
He was so absorbed in his personal musing that he missed the fact that two faces were now peering in at him through the small window in the door.
“And on what, exactly, did you base your decision to bring him through the Stargate with you?” Samuels demanded, his gaze never leaving the Jaffa that was sitting on the bed.
“He saved us,” Jack answered simply. “He risked his life and gave up everything he's ever known to get us out of that prison and through the gate. If he was just doing this to betray us, I doubt he'd put up with this. I mean, come on! The guy is a tank,” O'Neill finished, his confidence in his decision never wavering. Samuels made a few more snotty remarks that started to wind Jack up before Hammond stepped in.
“Enough,” he said, finally turning his gaze onto Jack. “He will be confined to the base when he is not off world,” Hammond pronounced. “He will have limited access to the facilities on base. Medical, mess, gym and other recreational areas. This will be open to negotiation in the future. However, at the first sign of betrayal, he will be detained and sent to a secure facility in Area 51 as soon as possible.”
Jack nodded, understanding the risks that Hammond was taking siding with him on this.
“He will be your responsibility, Colonel.”
“Yes Sir,” he said with a sharp nod. Hammond gave him the eye once more before he left, heading back toward his office with Samuels' on his heels, complaining the whole way.
Jack quickly waved off the guards and invited himself into Teal'c holding room. The Jaffa immediately rose to his feet and regarded O'Neill with the practiced eye of a soldier.
“Come on, I'll show ya around, maybe grab a bite to eat and then we'll find you some real quarters.”
Teal'c said nothing, but bowed his head slightly before holding his hands behind his back. He followed O'Neill out into the corridor, staying a respectful distance behind him, listening intently as O'Neill told him about the restrictions that he was under, as well as a few brief summaries about people on the base.
Teal'c worked on committing the oral lessons to memory right away. He knew that he was going to have to prove himself to the humans if he was ever going to have any measure of freedom and chance to free his people.
The sooner he learned their rules and ways, the sooner he could achieve his goals and return to his wife and son -- a wife and son he would not tell the humans about for fear that they would see them as a weakness.
Perhaps in time he'd share his wife and son with the humans. O'Neill was already well on his way to gaining Teal'c's unquestioning loyalty and the rest of SG1 were not far behind.
Captain Carter was a more than capable warrior and she was obviously a great scholar to her people. He felt a great need to protect the female, but knew he was going to have to curb that instinct. Captain Carter could take care of herself.
Daniel Jackson on the other hand was going to need all the protecting he and the others could provide. The man was a scholar with no warrior training what so ever.
He decided immediately that he would make keeping Daniel Jackson safe his top priority. He was the man who had opened the Chappa'ai, the Stargate, for the humans and he too was a great scholar. He had a feeling that if he could protect Daniel Jackson it would go a long way to proving his loyalty to his new people.
“You still with me?” Jack asked suddenly.
“I am, O'Neill,” Teal'c assured him.
“Just checking,” he said, eyeing the large man. “You're pretty quiet back there.”
“I am simply absorbing the information you are sharing with me, as well as memorizing the layout of the base.”
There was no need to tell O'Neill about his personal musings at this juncture.
“Don't worry about it,” he told him with a shrug, slowing his stride until he was walking shoulder to shoulder with Teal'c. “We can always go over it again. And I can probably get a hold of a map for you at some point.”
Teal'c tried to adjust his stride to put a respectful distance between them again, but O'Neill would simply adjust his stride again to stay next to Teal'c. A ghost of a smile graced Teal'c's lips when he realized that in O'Neill's mind, he was already an equal.
If he accomplished nothing else, he had at least proven his loyalty to his commanding officer, something that made Teal'c think things were going to work out in the end after all.
*&*
Doubts
**
Teal'c sat alone, away from the other Jaffa who had come to pay their respects. Some were friends of his wife and son, while others were simply there to pay their respects because she had been his wife and mother of his only child.
The funeral pyre that held his wife burned brightly in the background. His son had long since returned to the gathered Jaffa.
The two had talked, smoothed over the rough edges that had appeared in their relationship, but now the boy was seeking solace with people Teal'c feared he knew better than his own father.
He believed in freedom for all Jaffa. He knew he believed in it; that it would happen someday. But part of him was beginning to wonder if the sacrifices he was making, was forcing others to make, were truly worth it in the end.
The list was long: abandoning his wife and child to the not-so-tender mercies of a false God; allowing them to be shunned by former friends; forcing his wife into a loveless marriage so his son would be raised properly; making them live in this crude camp with none of the comforts he enjoyed on Earth.
But it didn’t end there. He allowed his son to be kidnapped and brain washed by a false God; to be convinced to end his own life and that of every person on Earth because he was essentially chasing a dream. And it was a distant dream at that.
Now he had yet again sacrificed his wife to the cause; only this time there was no way to retrieve her. He so filled her with hope and hatred of the Goa'uld that she refused to take a new symbiote to save herself and he had lost her forever.
Teal'c didn't feel very much like the protector and provider he was raised to be at the moment.
He sighed heavily as he turned his gaze to the flames in the distance that were reaching towards the stars, small sparks and smoke fluttering away in the breeze.
He paused for a moment and wished that he had allowed the members of SG1 to accompany him. They had truly become his friends and family during his time on Earth, accepting him without question and defending him even when they didn't have to.
He missed their support and the calm, steady reassurance they would have provided him with. But this wasn't the place for the humans. His wife was one of the first to willingly sacrifice herself as an example to the cause. This was a time for Jaffa to gather, to reflect on the magnitude of the quest they were embarking on. This was a time for them to decide if this is really the life they want.
Teal'c couldn't help but take a moment to think about his own motives. Was he really doing the right thing? Was all this actually going to be worth it in the end? He was sure the Jaffa would see freedom eventually. He just hoped it would be in his lifetime. He needed it to happen in his lifetime. He needed to see that all his sacrifices, all the bridges he had burned were truly worth it. He needed to know that his wife and child had not suffered in vain.
After a long moment, he stood, leaving the ragged stone steps that led up to the Stargate. He walked a few feet away before tipping his head towards the stars. He had often seen Major Carter take such action when they were off world and she was troubled. He had asked her once, why she did it and she had explained that she found it reassuring.
“No matter where we are in the universe, what is going on, the stars are always there. They're the one constant in my life that I can always count on to be there.”
He'd given her a look and she'd chuckled, explaining that while SG1 was a constant in her life, they weren't always with her physically.
They may be captured, in the infirmary or simply at home, but the stars were with her no matter where she was. She trusted in them just as she trusted her mathematical equations.
He took comfort in her certainty and he knew that SG1 and the other members of the SGC took comfort in his certainty and that thought was exactly what he needed at that moment. If he could so blindly believe in them and they in him, he could put that same blind trust into the rebel Jaffa.
Teal'c dropped his gaze back to the group gathered around the funeral pyre and he no longer felt hollow in his chest. Instead, he felt a spark of hope. With a ghost of a smile quirking his lips, he calmly walked back towards the group, ready to rejoin the world.
*&*
Freedom
**
It was late. It had been a long day and Teal'c really should be in bed, but he simply couldn't put his mind to rest.
He supposed he had good reason to still be excited, the last vestiges of adrenaline still running through his body, it had been a glorious battle after all.
The Jaffa had taken and held Dakara against Ba'al, Anubis and the Replicators. They had also successfully eliminated all the Replicators in the Milky Way galaxy in one shot with the help of Samantha Carter, her father Jacob and the Tok'ra Selmac.
All these things were certainly worth celebrating, but the main reason he was still awake, that all the Jaffa on Dakara were still awake, was that they were finally free. The Jaffa had freed themselves of the Goa'uld with the help of the Tok'ra and the Tau'ri, and they were now on their own with only themselves to answer to.
They were finally their own masters, and with Tretonin readily available they were no longer dependent on the Goa'uld for anything.
They no longer needed to worry about securing symbiotes for their children or themselves. And those still carrying an infant Goa’uld could choose to remove it if they so desired.
The Jaffa were free in every sense of the word and Teal'c could not be prouder of his people than he was now. There were a few Jaffa who were still loyal to false gods, but it was only a matter of time before they saw the error of their ways and came to Dakara seeking freedom and sanctuary.
Teal'c moved slowly through the sacred temple and up the stairs until he could look out upon the grounds. Light from the stars and moon glinted off the Stargate standing tall and proud in the distance.
A light breeze made it's way through the stonework, and Teal'c couldn't help but take a deep breath. His very soul felt lighter knowing that this world was theirs and no one would take it from them.
He did worry about his Tau'ri friends. He had pledged his allegiance to them until the Jaffa were free, and now that he had achieved that goal he would be leaving them. There were very few among them who had real experience dealing with freedom. If the Jaffa nation were to survive, it would require all of them to remain on Dakara and lead the others; to teach them what freedom truly meant.
As he continued to survey the land in front of him, Teal'c had visions of an elected government, every group of Jaffa represented equally and fairly no matter their size or military power, of a Dakara that was flourishing with life. Where small villages would crop up, farmland that would turn the landscape green instead of the rust colored dirt that was around him at the moment. The air would fill with the sounds of children who had known nothing but freedom and elders who would not hesitate to remind the young ones of what it took to give them the life they now enjoyed.
It was a grand vision and it pleased him greatly, even if it was several years away from reality. The potential was there and the only thing in the way was themselves.
“I see you cannot rest either,” Bra'tac said, shattering Teal'c's quiet musings.
“There is much on my mind,” he confided to his oldest friend. “I see a future full of great things.”
“As do I Brother,” he said, clapping a hand on Teal'c shoulder as they both shared a smile. “And we are finally free to make dreams a reality.”
*&*
On to part 5
Back to part 3
Teal'c
Failure
**
It was bright and sunny outside and he was busy with the other boys in the neighborhood, pretending to be members of their God's army.
They were waging their own terrific war in the name of Cronus when his mother had come out side and shooed the other boys to their mothers before bringing him inside.
Teal'c didn't understand why the soldiers of Cronus were at their house. He tried to be brave and stand proudly at her side, but the Jaffa were so tall and their staff weapons so intimidating that he quickly hid himself behind his mother's skirts.
He could bring himself to do nothing more than cling to her and peak out around her. They cast a quick eye down at him before bringing their eyes back up to his mother and continuing their conversation.
His father was Cronus' First Prime and when your father was First Prime and away in battle, there was only one reason that soldiers appeared at your door.
Teal'c swallowed hard but didn't do anything except pull himself up as tall as he could. If he was right, he was going to have additional responsibilities around the house now.
“You will come immediately,” the guard said, stepping back slightly.
His mother's face tightened before she reached behind her and ushered Teal'c to step out and walk beside her. He looked up at her and was not surprised to see that she was standing tall, her chin raised slightly as they walked down the street towards Cronus' palace.
As soon as they stepped into the lavish palace, Teal'c shrunk into his mother's side slightly. He wanted to be brave, but he was actually walking in his God's palace and he was more than a little intimidated.
Placing a soft hand on his back, Teal’c’s mother urged her son on and into the throne room. They both knelt in front of Cronus without hesitation.
When his father appeared, injured but alive, Teal'c was at a loss as to why there were there. Usually when the family of the First Prime was led to the palace, it meant that the First Prime had fallen in glorious battle and would be honored as a hero.
The next few moments burned their way into Teal’c’s mind and stayed there for the rest of his life, although it took several years to actually unravel the series of events.
His father was dragged in front of Cronus and berated for not sacrificing his life for his God. Ronac tried to protest, but Cronus would hear nothing of it. Cronus quickly announced that Teal'c and his mother would be exiled for his dishonor. Then there was the flash of movement before Cronus was on top of Ronac. The God ripped his fathers armour off before plunging his hand into the symbiote pouch. Teal'c had no choice but to watch as Cronus slowly squeezed the life of his fathers symbiote. Ronac fell to the floor soon after.
Teal'c and his mother were ushered to the Chappa'ai and then to Chulak as a gift to Apophis.
They fell to the ground in front of Apophis' First Prime and were quickly grabbed and dragged to his palace, swearing their loyalty before having their tattoos removed and replaced.
They tied Teal'c down tightly, but that wasn’t necessary. He lay perfectly still while the painful procedures took place. Teal'c was too busy thinking about what he had seen in Cronus' palace to be concerned with what was happening at the moment.
His father had failed in battle according to Cronus, but hadn't according to his father.
Teal'c had always been taught that to properly serve one's God, one must be honest and true to one's self.
You couldn't be true to your self if you lied, so Teal'c had to assume that his father wasn't lying.
That didn't surprise him at all, because his father had been an honest man, a man who never lied about anything. But Cronus had said that Ronac had failed, that he was lying about what had happened during the battle.
Since gods had no reason to lie, Teal’c drew the conclusion that his father was the liar and not Cronos. Ronac failed in battle and lied to cover his mistakes with no regard for what it would mean to his wife and son. His father was a coward, and this revelation scared Teal'c far more than anything else he had witnessed today.
“They boy did not cry out, My Lord,” the First Prime said with a touch of wonder in his voice. Teal'c looked around and realized he was now standing in the throne room.
“Is that so?” Apophis asked, leaning forward as his lavish robes whispered against themselves. “Bring him to me.”
The First Prime quickly took Teal'c by the arm and up a short flight of stairs, where the boy immediately fell to his knees, his eyes locked on his God’s feet for a second before being dragged upright again.
Apophis studied him for a long moment before ordering him to look him in the eye. Teal'c did hesitantly, locking eyes with his God for a moment before quickly dropping his gaze again.
“He is indeed a fine specimen,” Apophis pronounced after a moment, sliding back onto his throne. “Begin his training immediately, Bra'tac. I want you to oversee it personally.”
“Yes, my Lord,” the First Prime said with a slight nod of his head before ushering the boy out of the room. And with that, Teal'c's life was changed forever.
*&*
Impending parenthood
**
Normally, the hours Teal'c would spend working out with Bra'tac sped along. Before he knew it, Bra'tac would be calling an end to the day’s session as the sun began to dip below the horizon, signaling the end of another day.
Today however, things were not moving as smoothly as normal. Teal'c had been working with Bra'tac for hours now, but his head was not into the practice.
The former First Prime was beating him left and right at every turn instead of every second turn like usual, and no matter how many times the old man pointed this out, Teal'c couldn't force his mind back to the task at hand. Teal'c inability to focus his mind on the task at hand was leaving both men more than a little frustrated.
Teal'c wanted to be frustrated himself, wanted to narrow his focus to the sparing practice that he was supposed to be participating in but he couldn't. His thoughts were spread in a million different directions and improving his skills as a warrior was not a high priority at the moment.
He knew this in itself should be a learning moment. That no matter what is going on in a warrior's life, he should remain focused on the battle at all times. If he didn't, he was sure to be killed.
“You are distracted. Again,” Bra'tac said, lowering his staff weapon.
The disappointment and frustration in his voice was more than evident. Teal'c lowered his staff weapon as well as he wondered whether or not to share the source of his distraction with his mentor.
“Drey'auc is with child,” he finally admitted. Bra'tac's face lit up in a smile and he slapped Teal'c on the back, offering his congratulations.
“A child is indeed a blessing,” he said proudly. “May your son be a great warrior and your daughter a fine woman.” Teal'c accepted the standard congratulation. “You are not pleased?” he asked after a moment.
“I am . . . concerned.”
“As you should be,” Bra'tac replied gravely, inclining his head slightly as he leaned on his staff weapon.
“If the Goa'uld are indeed false Gods, what kind of world am I bringing a child into?” he asked. “What right do I have to bring a child into this world only to have them forced into the servitude of a false God?”
“What right does a false God have to deny you the honor and pleasure of raising a child?” Bra'tac countered. Teal'c sighed heavily. “Are you concerned because of what happened to your father?” he asked cautiously.
“How can I be the father my child deserves if my own father was killed before I truly knew him?” Teal'c asked quietly, finally admitting his real fears.
“You are a fine man and a great warrior. Your honesty and integrity set you above any other warrior I have ever met. These qualities alone will allow you to raise an exceptional child. Plus, you must remember that you will not be alone in this arduous task. Drey'auc will be by your side through this journey.”
Teal'c considered these words carefully for a moment before Bra'tac called him back to reality again.
“I should be scolding you for allowing yourself to be distracted by personal matters,” Bra'tac said, a grave look on his face.
Teal'c quickly assured him that his mind was now at ease and could focus wholly on his training.
Teal'c's picked up his staff weapon and readied himself, but his mind was no more on the sparing practice than it was before.
However, this time instead of worrying about his ability to parent, he was picturing a healthy boy who would look up to him and admire him.
*&*
Loyalties
**
These humans had plainer taste than the Goa'uld.
Teal'c’s normal surroundings consisted of gold softened with the finest silks and satins, not hard gray concrete walls. There was very little in the room to break up the monotony of the gray, either.
With nothing else to do, Teal'c sat patiently on the bed in the room the humans had placed him. O'Neill had assured him that he was safe, that this was all standard procedure, but he wasn't completely sure.
If he had to deal with a defector, he would use whatever means necessary to obtain – and verify – any information that person might have. The humans didn't do that.
What the humans had done is given him a thorough medical examination, even though he assured them that his symbiote protected him from any pathogens.
He was then asked to removed his amour and wear the clothing they provided for him and asked to wait in a room devoid of anything except for a bed and facilities to relieve himself should the need arise.
Not lost to him was the fact that there was a guard standing outside his door and a monitoring device affixed to the ceiling in the corner of the room. He focused his attention on that small device for a moment before refocusing his gaze straight ahead.
He sat with his back ramrod straight; ready to react at a moments notice, just as he had always been trained to do.
Teal’c had been sitting in the room for some time now, trying to figure out exactly what their plan was. Had O'Neill lied to him? Had he risked his live to save O'Neill, his team and the other prisoners only to become a prisoner himself after being promised freedom?
He was so absorbed in his personal musing that he missed the fact that two faces were now peering in at him through the small window in the door.
“And on what, exactly, did you base your decision to bring him through the Stargate with you?” Samuels demanded, his gaze never leaving the Jaffa that was sitting on the bed.
“He saved us,” Jack answered simply. “He risked his life and gave up everything he's ever known to get us out of that prison and through the gate. If he was just doing this to betray us, I doubt he'd put up with this. I mean, come on! The guy is a tank,” O'Neill finished, his confidence in his decision never wavering. Samuels made a few more snotty remarks that started to wind Jack up before Hammond stepped in.
“Enough,” he said, finally turning his gaze onto Jack. “He will be confined to the base when he is not off world,” Hammond pronounced. “He will have limited access to the facilities on base. Medical, mess, gym and other recreational areas. This will be open to negotiation in the future. However, at the first sign of betrayal, he will be detained and sent to a secure facility in Area 51 as soon as possible.”
Jack nodded, understanding the risks that Hammond was taking siding with him on this.
“He will be your responsibility, Colonel.”
“Yes Sir,” he said with a sharp nod. Hammond gave him the eye once more before he left, heading back toward his office with Samuels' on his heels, complaining the whole way.
Jack quickly waved off the guards and invited himself into Teal'c holding room. The Jaffa immediately rose to his feet and regarded O'Neill with the practiced eye of a soldier.
“Come on, I'll show ya around, maybe grab a bite to eat and then we'll find you some real quarters.”
Teal'c said nothing, but bowed his head slightly before holding his hands behind his back. He followed O'Neill out into the corridor, staying a respectful distance behind him, listening intently as O'Neill told him about the restrictions that he was under, as well as a few brief summaries about people on the base.
Teal'c worked on committing the oral lessons to memory right away. He knew that he was going to have to prove himself to the humans if he was ever going to have any measure of freedom and chance to free his people.
The sooner he learned their rules and ways, the sooner he could achieve his goals and return to his wife and son -- a wife and son he would not tell the humans about for fear that they would see them as a weakness.
Perhaps in time he'd share his wife and son with the humans. O'Neill was already well on his way to gaining Teal'c's unquestioning loyalty and the rest of SG1 were not far behind.
Captain Carter was a more than capable warrior and she was obviously a great scholar to her people. He felt a great need to protect the female, but knew he was going to have to curb that instinct. Captain Carter could take care of herself.
Daniel Jackson on the other hand was going to need all the protecting he and the others could provide. The man was a scholar with no warrior training what so ever.
He decided immediately that he would make keeping Daniel Jackson safe his top priority. He was the man who had opened the Chappa'ai, the Stargate, for the humans and he too was a great scholar. He had a feeling that if he could protect Daniel Jackson it would go a long way to proving his loyalty to his new people.
“You still with me?” Jack asked suddenly.
“I am, O'Neill,” Teal'c assured him.
“Just checking,” he said, eyeing the large man. “You're pretty quiet back there.”
“I am simply absorbing the information you are sharing with me, as well as memorizing the layout of the base.”
There was no need to tell O'Neill about his personal musings at this juncture.
“Don't worry about it,” he told him with a shrug, slowing his stride until he was walking shoulder to shoulder with Teal'c. “We can always go over it again. And I can probably get a hold of a map for you at some point.”
Teal'c tried to adjust his stride to put a respectful distance between them again, but O'Neill would simply adjust his stride again to stay next to Teal'c. A ghost of a smile graced Teal'c's lips when he realized that in O'Neill's mind, he was already an equal.
If he accomplished nothing else, he had at least proven his loyalty to his commanding officer, something that made Teal'c think things were going to work out in the end after all.
*&*
Doubts
**
Teal'c sat alone, away from the other Jaffa who had come to pay their respects. Some were friends of his wife and son, while others were simply there to pay their respects because she had been his wife and mother of his only child.
The funeral pyre that held his wife burned brightly in the background. His son had long since returned to the gathered Jaffa.
The two had talked, smoothed over the rough edges that had appeared in their relationship, but now the boy was seeking solace with people Teal'c feared he knew better than his own father.
He believed in freedom for all Jaffa. He knew he believed in it; that it would happen someday. But part of him was beginning to wonder if the sacrifices he was making, was forcing others to make, were truly worth it in the end.
The list was long: abandoning his wife and child to the not-so-tender mercies of a false God; allowing them to be shunned by former friends; forcing his wife into a loveless marriage so his son would be raised properly; making them live in this crude camp with none of the comforts he enjoyed on Earth.
But it didn’t end there. He allowed his son to be kidnapped and brain washed by a false God; to be convinced to end his own life and that of every person on Earth because he was essentially chasing a dream. And it was a distant dream at that.
Now he had yet again sacrificed his wife to the cause; only this time there was no way to retrieve her. He so filled her with hope and hatred of the Goa'uld that she refused to take a new symbiote to save herself and he had lost her forever.
Teal'c didn't feel very much like the protector and provider he was raised to be at the moment.
He sighed heavily as he turned his gaze to the flames in the distance that were reaching towards the stars, small sparks and smoke fluttering away in the breeze.
He paused for a moment and wished that he had allowed the members of SG1 to accompany him. They had truly become his friends and family during his time on Earth, accepting him without question and defending him even when they didn't have to.
He missed their support and the calm, steady reassurance they would have provided him with. But this wasn't the place for the humans. His wife was one of the first to willingly sacrifice herself as an example to the cause. This was a time for Jaffa to gather, to reflect on the magnitude of the quest they were embarking on. This was a time for them to decide if this is really the life they want.
Teal'c couldn't help but take a moment to think about his own motives. Was he really doing the right thing? Was all this actually going to be worth it in the end? He was sure the Jaffa would see freedom eventually. He just hoped it would be in his lifetime. He needed it to happen in his lifetime. He needed to see that all his sacrifices, all the bridges he had burned were truly worth it. He needed to know that his wife and child had not suffered in vain.
After a long moment, he stood, leaving the ragged stone steps that led up to the Stargate. He walked a few feet away before tipping his head towards the stars. He had often seen Major Carter take such action when they were off world and she was troubled. He had asked her once, why she did it and she had explained that she found it reassuring.
“No matter where we are in the universe, what is going on, the stars are always there. They're the one constant in my life that I can always count on to be there.”
He'd given her a look and she'd chuckled, explaining that while SG1 was a constant in her life, they weren't always with her physically.
They may be captured, in the infirmary or simply at home, but the stars were with her no matter where she was. She trusted in them just as she trusted her mathematical equations.
He took comfort in her certainty and he knew that SG1 and the other members of the SGC took comfort in his certainty and that thought was exactly what he needed at that moment. If he could so blindly believe in them and they in him, he could put that same blind trust into the rebel Jaffa.
Teal'c dropped his gaze back to the group gathered around the funeral pyre and he no longer felt hollow in his chest. Instead, he felt a spark of hope. With a ghost of a smile quirking his lips, he calmly walked back towards the group, ready to rejoin the world.
*&*
Freedom
**
It was late. It had been a long day and Teal'c really should be in bed, but he simply couldn't put his mind to rest.
He supposed he had good reason to still be excited, the last vestiges of adrenaline still running through his body, it had been a glorious battle after all.
The Jaffa had taken and held Dakara against Ba'al, Anubis and the Replicators. They had also successfully eliminated all the Replicators in the Milky Way galaxy in one shot with the help of Samantha Carter, her father Jacob and the Tok'ra Selmac.
All these things were certainly worth celebrating, but the main reason he was still awake, that all the Jaffa on Dakara were still awake, was that they were finally free. The Jaffa had freed themselves of the Goa'uld with the help of the Tok'ra and the Tau'ri, and they were now on their own with only themselves to answer to.
They were finally their own masters, and with Tretonin readily available they were no longer dependent on the Goa'uld for anything.
They no longer needed to worry about securing symbiotes for their children or themselves. And those still carrying an infant Goa’uld could choose to remove it if they so desired.
The Jaffa were free in every sense of the word and Teal'c could not be prouder of his people than he was now. There were a few Jaffa who were still loyal to false gods, but it was only a matter of time before they saw the error of their ways and came to Dakara seeking freedom and sanctuary.
Teal'c moved slowly through the sacred temple and up the stairs until he could look out upon the grounds. Light from the stars and moon glinted off the Stargate standing tall and proud in the distance.
A light breeze made it's way through the stonework, and Teal'c couldn't help but take a deep breath. His very soul felt lighter knowing that this world was theirs and no one would take it from them.
He did worry about his Tau'ri friends. He had pledged his allegiance to them until the Jaffa were free, and now that he had achieved that goal he would be leaving them. There were very few among them who had real experience dealing with freedom. If the Jaffa nation were to survive, it would require all of them to remain on Dakara and lead the others; to teach them what freedom truly meant.
As he continued to survey the land in front of him, Teal'c had visions of an elected government, every group of Jaffa represented equally and fairly no matter their size or military power, of a Dakara that was flourishing with life. Where small villages would crop up, farmland that would turn the landscape green instead of the rust colored dirt that was around him at the moment. The air would fill with the sounds of children who had known nothing but freedom and elders who would not hesitate to remind the young ones of what it took to give them the life they now enjoyed.
It was a grand vision and it pleased him greatly, even if it was several years away from reality. The potential was there and the only thing in the way was themselves.
“I see you cannot rest either,” Bra'tac said, shattering Teal'c's quiet musings.
“There is much on my mind,” he confided to his oldest friend. “I see a future full of great things.”
“As do I Brother,” he said, clapping a hand on Teal'c shoulder as they both shared a smile. “And we are finally free to make dreams a reality.”
*&*
On to part 5
Back to part 3
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Date: 2010-08-12 08:19 pm (UTC)Lovely, lovely stuff.
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Date: 2010-08-13 03:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-08-16 12:47 pm (UTC)